January 8th, 2021 | Josh Adelman
We are excited to honor US Air Force TSgt PJ Hardaway as our December 2020 Soldier Coach of the Month. PJ has been coaching youth football for the past 8 years and has worked diligently at improving his craft through the Soldiers to Sidelines Membership Development Program. Most recently, he has successfully been accepted into the Skill Bridge Program which resulted in a coaching internship with the University of the Incarnate Word football team in San Antonio, Texas effective January 2021.
PJ began his coaching career after attending many of his son’s youth practices and leaving with a bad taste. He witnessed several volunteer coaches with little training failing to teach during practice and then scream at young kids during the game for making mistakes. PJ says, “I felt I would need to step in and stop complaining and get involved to be a coach that teaches, inspires and most of all leads.” Coach Hardaway was bit by the bug, and now he is pursuing a professional career in coaching as he transitions from the US Air Force.
Coaching has impacted PJ just as much he has impacted young athletes. He realized first hand that he could positively influence young people far greater than he could influence the game. PJ reflects, “Coaching has impacted me as a person by humbling me to the core. I thought I knew so much about coaching and found out that I knew very little. Most of all, coaching has made me a better person because I have been blessed to coach kids from all over the country and put their life lenses on to see and understand their situation. Life is not perfect. And for some of my past players, it has been a nightmare filled with uncertainty and lack of support from their own family. Coaching means more to me than anyone from the outside ever can understand. I say that because coaching is multifaceted where you can wear numerous hats during practice. Players have depended on me mentally and emotionally on and off the field. Some of my athletes look at me as a father figure, mentor, leader and a friend. Sometimes it had me in tears when we lost games, or if my player got hurt. I see the effort that they put in, especially the dedication and determination as well. I have more empathy; I try to be more approachable and relatable because I want to ensure they have the right tools to succeed in life first and one the field second.”
Coach Hardaway is particularly proud of one his players nicknamed Peanut, James Vallejo. You can hear in his words the love he feels for his players. PJ says, “He showed me so much resiliency and he is adaptable. When I first coached him, I asked him what position he plays and he said DB. I told him I needed a LB and asked if he was willing to make that transition. He said sure coach. Well, once I started training him he caught on so quickly and moved up the depth chart and became the best LB in youth football I have ever coached. He is very coachable, humble and reliable. His work ethic alone will take him far. He is well known around the city [San Antonio, TX] as a very disciplined and reliable LB. The high school he will be going to next year can’t wait to get him on the team. He is a natural leader that demands effort.”
PJ will admit that coaching is not all sunshine and happiness. It is hard work and takes an emotional toll. Especially when it comes to managing parents. “I will say not all are created equal, but some parents make it extremely hard for volunteer coaches to do their job. The countless hours that we put in and sacrificed time away from family goes unnoticed. Some parents in youth football are looking for short term goals rather than long term success when it comes to proper development in their child. They put a lot of pressure on their child that they should not be experiencing at their age. I have learned to just listen and give honest advice to my players when they need it. I have come to terms that parents are not going to change, and that I am not coaching the parents. I am coaching the kids, and I have the opportunity to mentor them to be better than me and their parents.”
Coach Hardaway has managed to keep this positive outlook, even in the most challenging of circumstances. The Covid-19 pandemic has made every aspect of coaching and teaching extremely difficult. He remarks, “Covid has changed the way I have coached mentally and emotionally. I have spent time by myself to learn new techniques in order to bring it back to my athletes. I have grown as a coach and I watch other coaches make mistakes I have made in the past. That is why I take it upon myself to mentor other coaches to become better at their craft.”
This sounds like the natural military leader within all of Soldier Coaches. PJ’s service in the US Air Force has primed to be a great leader among athletes and coaches. Coach Hardaway claims, “I have been able to utilize my leadership skills and adapt to the various personalities that I encounter every season. Being a NCO in the military has allowed me to constantly evaluate myself and the players on a daily basis. I know what to look for and I know how important it is to have a structured practice and pre game routine. My military experience has allowed me to have self awareness and give me the opportunity to be vulnerable and throw myself out there to be a kid again with the players when the time permits itself. In a nutshell, it has allowed me to be more relatable because I know how to get the most out of people because everyone is different.”
It is without question that Coach PJ Hardaway has earned the honor to be the December 2020 STS Coach of the Month.
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